I guess it was something with the rhytm that made me write "crab", which I actually did from the beginning. So I think I'll stick to it as it is and yes, why not a brackish pond?
I only know about the crabs' environment because my son fishes for them off the docks here (Strait of Juan de Fuca). He has caught crayfish in freshwater lakes, too. I personally prefer "crayfish," and think the rhythm works fine, but of course it is your poem. It is a delightful image.
July 16th, 2010 at 7:12 pm
This resting crab makes a nice image.
Thank you for posting this one~!
July 16th, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Very nice… :-)
July 16th, 2010 at 7:26 pm
coral
growing
on the remains
of the oil
platform
July 16th, 2010 at 11:52 pm
Coral slowly forms
on the ruined platform now.
May they rest in peace.
July 17th, 2010 at 1:32 am
Good. Dark, evocative of the ancient underwater quality of life and passing.
July 17th, 2010 at 1:52 am
great image…
peace and love
July 17th, 2010 at 6:35 pm
Evocative image…but I wonder if there are crabs in old ponds. I can envision crayfish…
July 17th, 2010 at 6:36 pm
Perhaps it could be a brackish pond?
July 17th, 2010 at 9:06 pm
Hm Alison,
you're actually right – it was a crayfish!
I guess it was something with the rhytm that made me write "crab", which I actually did from the beginning. So I think I'll stick to it as it is and yes, why not a brackish pond?
July 18th, 2010 at 7:01 pm
I only know about the crabs' environment because my son fishes for them off the docks here (Strait of Juan de Fuca). He has caught crayfish in freshwater lakes, too. I personally prefer "crayfish," and think the rhythm works fine, but of course it is your poem. It is a delightful image.
September 8th, 2010 at 12:18 pm
It is lovely! However, I just thought of a noirish variation:
old wreck—
a crab half out of the sunken sneaker