Writing on water
the egret, looking for fish
makes little foot-notes. 


—d. f. tweney
        

About the author: d. f. tweney (dft at tinywords dot com) is the publisher and chief haikuvangelist of tinywords.com. A technology journalist, he has also worked as a weed whacker, pizza chef, ESL teacher, and environmental activist, and he won the Boston Poetry Slam in 1992. He is secretly Canadian.

Responses to the haiku for 2 November 2000 by d. f. tweney

  1.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2003-08-28 16:01:26
     

    in looking back, how much clearer we see things; with this thought in mind, i adhered to the beckoning, and here i am, at the starting point.

    i see a side of the haiku-world, in your writing, many try to deny, for whatever reason(s).

    all the rules of do(s) and don't(s) widen my eyes, to wonder what those, whose voices champion a single path for the haiku, are trying to do. the thought rushes to mind, of someone hell-bent on a derailment.


    dft, i see what you are saying in your "haiku", because i have seen the egret, and your depiction is (a thing of beauty), especially the lighthearted mood it presents.


    continuing, it shows how we can "follow the rules, and break the rules", simultaneously; and there remains what the haiku was intended to be


    having placed my mind under restraints, i will not delve deeper, (for the moment); as the egret stands in, what seemingly appears to be, shallow water.


    good work

  2.  
    Narayanan Raghunathan (mahashishta at hotmail dot com)
    2004-01-02 00:09:39
     

    the lotus pond
    the lone bird shuffles
    the starry sky ~

  3.  
    john tiong chunghoo (bagiruang at yahoo dot com)
    2004-02-04 08:30:27
     

    fate
    poultry chasing dog i gave away
    ends up in the cooking pot

  4.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2004-04-25 14:33:26
     

    whispers in the wind --
    spread by the lofty pines
    twilight

    -

  5.  
    Vasile Moldovan
    2004-11-17 21:32:28
     

    Tickets of meal-
    the egret's foot-notes
    on water

  6.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2005-05-21 17:51:20
     

    reaching out
    from the darkness ~
    lone flicker of light

  7.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2006-03-05 14:11:29
     

    as spring returns
    once more...
    the song of the mockingbird

  8.