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Responses to the haiku for 21 December 2000 by John Dallas

1.  
   Zhanna P. Rader
   2003-03-06 19:45:41
    

   It looks to me that you are not showing as much as telling. Did you try to say (to show) it differently? Zhanna

2.  
   Norman Darlington
   2003-03-07 17:52:45
    

   I beg forgiveness if I am completely wrong, but I suspect Zhanna is missing a linguistic subtlety here, english not being her/his mother tongue.
   Line 1 is telling, sure.
   
   But what about:
   A line of thunderstorms
   Make mine a double
   This sounds like two distinct sentences, with the last reading like John's order to the barman. However, I read it as a single sentence, with the storms making his order a double, leaving us with a (I imagine) deliberate ambiguity between 'telling' and 'showing'.

3.  
   bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
   2003-12-22 00:01:45
    

   traveler's haven
   a drink in hand -
   
   coming in out of the rain

4.  
   Richard Goring
   2003-12-30 07:58:54
    

   Surely both Zhanna and Norman are missing the 'linguistic subtlety' here! 'Make mine a double' may be an order to a barman, but the implicit meaning here is that both airport bars and a line of thunderstorms make a traveller's life hell.

5.  
   Narayanan Raghunathan (mahashishta at hotmail dot com)
   2004-01-26 00:16:53
    

   thunderstorm~
   planes at rest dazzle
   in watery mazes
   
   lightning showers~
   lonely beggar plays
   the bamboo flute
   
   rains splash light~
   rainbow umbrellas
   traverse the winds
   
   drenched in rain
   ancient lovers dance
   midnight ecstasy

6.  
   john tiong chunghoo (bagiruang at yahoo dot com)
   2004-02-05 02:03:47
    

   world gone mad
   beijing airport staff
   gives way to a white woman jumping queue

7.  
   bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
   2004-05-01 18:58:21
    

   food for thought
   missing plane's departure ...
   my reflection in the glass
   
   -

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