inter-city train journey -
a rattling window top
shuts itself

—Alan Summers
        

Previously published in Presence haiku magazine (U.K.), September 2001

About the author: Alan's haiku and poetry is published in over 60 anthologies, and a number of languages. He regularly reads, performs, and workshops from venues as diverse as possible including shop windows; inner city rainforests; cliff tops; to the more orthodox places...on occasion. His website is: http://www.withwords.org.uk

Contact: alan at withwords dot org dot uk

 

Responses to the haiku for 2 July 2004 by Alan Summers

  1.  
    2004-07-02 07:03:21
     

    summer breeze
    a quiet house
    bursting at the seams

  2.  
    john tiong chunghoo
    2004-07-04 01:32:04
     

    widow's death
    her bamboo bell rattles
    through the night

  3.  
    lana b
    2004-07-04 06:59:27
     

    lost & found
    grandma's wedding ring
    with loose stone

  4.  
    Sue Schneider
    2004-07-06 15:29:43
     

    This haiku brought immediate memories of the ride on the Circumvisuviano inner-city 'train' that runs between Naples and Sorrento. We have knicknammed it the bone-rattler. You must have ridden it to come up with these words.

  5.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2004-07-06 19:18:29
     

    neighbor's death, behind locked doors -
    summer breeze
    through open windows

  6.  
    paul m.
    2004-07-19 15:14:38
     

    So many ways to see (or be) that window. Speaks very much of city living. An excellent poem!

  7.  
    2004-07-20 01:14:39
     

    -

    Thanks for all the kind comments and complementary haiku!

    all my best,

    Alan

    -

  8.  
    Narayanan Raghunathan (mahashishta at hotmail dot com)
    2004-08-04 11:49:50
     

    Thanks for this powerful Haiku Alan.

    crowded train~
    through the maze of faces
    a distant smile~

    train rattles on~
    stink from the toilet
    people drink coffee~

    train corridor~
    ugly old beggar
    covers his face
    with a dirty cloth~

  9.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2004-09-07 20:17:41
     

    bonsai tree
    on the cliff
    overlooking the clouds

    -

    inter-city train journey -
    a rattling window top
    shuts itself

  10.  
    2004-09-08 02:45:47
     

    -

    the rain ceases
    so I leave the sycamore. . .
    one more kingfisher


    -

  11.  
    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2005-01-15 13:33:02
     

    rainy day journey
    through my bedroom window
    the setting sun seems down

    -

  12.  
    2005-01-22 04:50:36
     

    -

    Dear Bob,

    Thank you for your bedroom window haiku which, alongside all the above train haiku, reminded me of my sleeper train haiku, so here it is!

    -
    -

    the night train passes
    along the mountain trail
    garlic snores

    Alan Summers


    le train de nuit passe
    sur une voie de montagne
    ronflements d'ail

    (French trans. Serge Tome - Temps Libre)

    -
    -


    another rain day
    I travel on foot
    to the train station


    Alan Summers

    -

  13.  
    prado chekov
    2005-09-19 17:41:15
     

    morning rain
    i think of father's voice
    until it stops

  14.  
    2005-09-20 01:03:47
     

    Dear Prado Chekov,

    A very moving haiku. It's open enough so I get my own response from it, and reminds me of my haiku that I wrote after my Father's funeral.


    the rain
    almost a friend
    this funeral


    Alan Summers

  15.  
    b.m.r.
    2009-02-02 15:51:29
     

    beneath the underpass
    stalled morning commute--
    one, no two dark pigeons

  16.