soft breeze--
a glimpse
of her thigh


—Mike Farley
        

About the author: I live with my wife Shirlee on a cattle ranch near the little ski town of Red Lodge, Montana, and have been loving and writing haiku for several years now. I draw my inspiration from the images of the high-plains, mountains, weather, wildlife, livestock, ranch work and outdoor recreation which surround me daily.

 

Responses to the haiku for 11 May 2007 by Mike Farley

  1.  
    Alan Summers
    2006-09-22 07:15:15
     

    I liked this. Very short and cheeky. ;-)

  2.  
    Mary Griffith
    2007-05-11 11:37:23
     

    Mike, I love this.

  3.  
    Troy Freund (troyfreund at mac dot com)
    2007-05-11 11:47:12
     

    Delicious, indeed.
    Nice job.
    Troy

  4.  
    Jeffrey Winke
    2007-05-11 12:26:46
     

    Hey, very nice...with a sensual tingle. Good work, Mike.

  5.  
    Collin Barber
    2007-05-11 16:43:33
     

    Ha! Nice one, Mike. I love it.

  6.  
    Carol Raisfeld
    2007-05-11 21:44:31
     

    Ah, those soft breezes.;-)
    A nice one, MIke. Very enjoyable.

  7.  
    mike farley
    2007-05-12 04:38:05
     

    Thank you wonderful friends.

  8.  
    judith ingram
    2007-05-12 06:48:50
     

    Mike . . . a wonderful poem! But, in your list of things that inspire you, how come there's no mention of thighs?

  9.  
    mike farley
    2007-05-12 08:17:52
     

    Well, I don't know. I guess I hadn't thought it thru that completely. I love the differences between men and women, such as the instantaneous and erotic attraction a man feels at a momentary glimpse of a female thigh. I guess I've thought of such things as being universal among poets and not needing special mention alongside the more unique features of my rural environment that inspire my haiku.

  10.  
    Darrell Byrd
    2007-05-12 10:40:27
     

    Erotic glimpses are rare in ranch life. Very personal and seldom shared. But , treasured forever. Thanks for sharing Mike. Now, it's different down at the Snow Creek Saloon in Redlodge. What you see there, you just leave there.

    Darrell Byrd

  11.  
    mike farley
    2007-05-12 11:08:32
     

    That's certainly true as well.

    On second reading, my haiku is actually a pretty lame "cause-and-effect" ku which clumsily attempts to tell us all "why" we're getting that glimpse.

    Perhaps a better L1 might be

    rustling leaves . . .
    a glimpse
    of her thigh

    in which the breeze appears wordlessly between the lines and better allows the reader his own experience.

  12.  
    RaV
    2007-05-12 13:47:18
     

    It seems I've been there before, Mike, but I couldn't record it as skilfully as you did.
    You managed to halt time just for that erotic-precious moment.
    Congrats and greetings,

    RaV

  13.  
    b. m. richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2007-05-12 18:46:49
     

    ah, michael, a toast to the softer things in life.
    i oftentimes say, "showing me less, gives rise to my imagination"

    -

    spring journey's end
    her eyes
    meeting mine

  14.  
    Agnes Margaretta Wedderburn
    2007-05-13 07:11:01
     

    Michael,
    I must concur with you regarding your revision, 'tis far superior.
    And, for you, a slightly more wordy seventeen syllabic regarding a "rustle":

    new lovers embrace
    eclipsing the eclipsing
    silver moon above

  15.  
    Georgia
    2007-05-14 13:52:32
     

    Yes indeed, the revision is lovely. I didn't like the first version at all. The "eroticism" seemed forced, gratuitous, & a little "fresh," or insulting -- but not at all erotic, from this woman's viewpoint. The revised version is truly erotic, for both sexes. Good work! May all your revisions be equally successful.

  16.  
    anthony slauson
    2007-05-14 17:10:10
     

    nice job mike..

    but with a stiff breeze,
    we get the whole damn thing

  17.  
    b. m. richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2007-05-15 05:33:05
     

    being the fly in the ointment, once more, mike i didn't read it as being "causal and effect"; more, a protection of vision, and happening to see some thigh. even with ellipsis, the revised version epitomizes.
    georgia, i cuddled your woman's point of view; until i read, "the revised version being more acceptable to 'both sexes' ".

    fault with the original; depends how one's mind is led.

  18.  
    Agatha Nipplewort
    2007-05-15 08:06:18
     

    O Mr. Richardson, you are such a nice romancer. Nevertheless, I must say that I like my fellows to know that "epitomize" is a transitive verb and thus requires at least one object. Say hello to your friend, Agnes for me. It seems that she would be much more to your liking. So good-bye.

    Agatha

  19.  
    b. m. richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2007-05-15 18:29:45
     

    agatha, this evening i tire; why such a paltry comment, however you did say i was "nice", thanks.

  20.  
    Agatha Nipplewort
    2007-05-15 20:33:54
     

    Dear Mr. Richardson, if trying to understand you is a paltry matter from your point of view, then why should I care? You said, "... the revised version epitomizes."
    I was wondering what it epitomizes. The verb needs an object. What does the revised version epitomize?

    You may answer in the morning. It is past my bedtime.

    Agatha

  21.  
    b. m. richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2007-05-16 04:24:30
     

    good morning agatha,
    within any verb, that part of speech whose essential function is to express existence, action, or occurrence, some immediate understanding exist(for some).
    akin to the haiku, for the intellect certain things can be surmised.
    -
    epitomizes: to make abstract, to typify, or even to make a summary

    żagatha, in my usage, can you see any of these meanings without an (object)?

  22.  
    Agatha Nipplewort
    2007-05-16 06:34:59
     

    In a word, young man, no! Go to the "One Look Dictionary Search" (www.onelook.com/)and type in "epitomize" and read from 18 different dictionaries. Note that the definitions often end with "of," meaning the object is missing. Most definitions say transitive verb. Some say "followed by an object." You are misreading. It is not to "make" abstract, but to abstract (object). These are my last comments

  23.  
    b. m. richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2007-05-16 09:52:35
     

    in remembrance of my kindergarten reader:
    fun with dick and jane
    see spot
    see spot run
    -
    well, agatha, heaven forbid these being my last comments.
    are you that easily led by anything you read. somewhere along life's road, surely by now, you should know these rules were not written in concrete...


    agatha, i almost forgot puff, the yellow kitten, and sally, tim, mother, and father...

  24.  
    prado chekov
    2007-05-16 13:01:15
     

    mike,
    either way an effective "glimpse."
    ms. nipplewort, couldn't you have come
    up with a better pseudonym than nipplewort?
    prado

  25.  
    Agatha Nipplewort
    2007-05-16 18:13:30
     

    Mr. Chekov or is it Ensign Chekov, you're like the pot calling the kettle black. Prado Chekov sounds like a museum in a meadow outside Moscow.

    And I am not "the kettle" either. I admit, my family did change its name in the 1550s from Nipplewyrt.

    For starters, you should ask Ms Merriweather, Ms Applebottom, and the Prisswillow sisters about pseudonyms. Indeed!

    Agatha

  26.  
    mike farley
    2007-05-17 19:32:47
     

    The only other semi-erotic haiku I've experienced and felt inspired to write ...

    spring storm--
    the warm spot where
    the dental nurse leans

  27.  
    Tanya Hourglass
    2007-05-20 06:25:30
     

    poetic sisters
    numerous
    sharing

  28.  
    michele
    2007-06-20 09:01:03
     

    Hi Mike. This reminds me of "23, skidoo", where gentlemen used to stand on 23rd street in Manhattan hoping for breezes generated by the skyscrapers. Skirts would be lifted, and policemen used to tell the gathered gawkers "skidoo!" (Scram, get outta here!). Haha. Some things never change. Best, Michele

  29.  
    Quinn Farley
    2010-11-17 08:57:01
     

    Goodnight, sweet prince.
    The cowboy poet sleeps for now...

  30.