open skylight 
releasing a moth 
into the fog

—Josh Wikoff
        

About the author: Josh lives with his wife and daughters in Northern California. Some of his poems have sllipped past the editors of Acorn, Asahi Haikuist Network, Chrysanthemum, The Heron's Nest, Lynx, Mariposa, Roadrunner, Shamrock Haiku Journal, and Tinywords.

Responses to the haiku for 19 September 2007 by Josh Wikoff

  1.  
    Alan Summers
    2007-09-19 22:26:38
     

    Good economic use of words to reach a good effect in an English-language haiku.

    I can feel a gentle breeze on my face as the moth is released.

  2.  
    Ed Schwellenbach
    2007-09-19 22:36:01
     

    I like your work, Josh. The present example is fresh, well crafted, and vivid.


    a moth flies
    just above the splashing water
    shower partner

  3.  
    electraglide
    2007-09-20 02:27:49
     

    MYSTIC
    loose tile
    a moth flutters
    into the stars

    We bear in mind the monastic origins of haiku (modified by samurai for more pressing purpose-Basho was one). The original zen technique was to eliminate self in an 'aha! moment' and transpose (wrap) this experience in a transparent verbal delivery system. Of course ALL the variants are wonderful, but..

  4.  
    laryalee
    2007-09-20 13:11:23
     

    Very nice, Josh...
    the soft blending of skylight/moth/fog
    creates a memorable moment!
    ;)
    Lary

  5.  
    Collin Barber
    2007-09-20 21:04:53
     

    Great, Josh. I agree with all of the above comments. Very nice.


    Collin

  6.  
    Magyar
    2007-09-21 08:40:11
     

    Josh, a progressive image!
    _I'm forever drawn to a 'coexistence' between the modern, and ancient; there were -fogs and moths- long before... skylights.

    pond songs
    crickets frogs and rain
    a distant highway
    _M

  7.  
    josh wikoff
    2007-09-21 12:26:20
     

    Thank you all for your very kind remarks.

    It was my daughter's hand which released the moth through the skylight. As is often the case, I owe my inspiration to her.

  8.  
    b. m. richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2007-09-21 15:32:02
     

    skylight
    gathers twinkling raindrops...
    stars in horde

  9.  
    Angelika Wienert
    2007-09-22 13:26:17
     

    sorry, i`m a bit late with my comment...

    i like your haiku very much, Josh!

    best wishes,
    Angelika

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