towering pines
a bobcat prowls
in the early mist
Published by
Allen McGill
Allen McGill San Miguel de Allende, Mexico aljons at yahoo.com Originally from NYC, Allen lives, writes, acts and directs theatre in Mexico. His published fiction, non-fiction, poetry, plays, etc., have appeared in print as well as on line: NY Times, The Writer, Newsday, Retrozine, Laughter Loaf, Flashquake, Herons Nest, Cenotaph, TempsLibres, Autumn Leaves, Poetic Voices,Amaze-Cinquain, Bottle Rocket, Frogpond, Modern Haiku, World Haiku Review, many others. View all posts by Allen McGill
a very enjoyable read Allen,
best,
I liked this as well… In the image I received from this poem, the needles of the pine tree were similar to the tawny fur of the bobcat, although they’re also an obvious contrast (the tall immobile trees and the small stealthy cat). The early morning mist was a nice addition. The only suggestion I’d make would be to add a kireji after “pines” to give it more of a pause, and emphasize the contrast, ex. “…” or “–“. Otherwise, well done!
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azure –
imprinted by the tallest pine
atop, sings the yellow bird
last breath
grandma points
towards home
sweltering summer morning –
blue jay
chirping outside my door
–