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What I liked about this poem when I first read it was its mystery and how it triggered my imagination. Gunshots in the city or in the country make you think — what's going on? is someone being robbed or killed? Is it deer season? Or is someone just celebrating with shots in the air? I like how this short poem by "opening the dark" closes the distance between each of us. Both man and beast. Good job.
November 3rd, 2010 at 2:47 pm
Gives me the creeps… In a good way :-p
November 3rd, 2010 at 3:00 pm
great and in one line too
marlene
November 3rd, 2010 at 4:59 pm
please un-subscribe me….thanks.
November 3rd, 2010 at 7:23 pm
Dear Marge,
It would be a shame to see you go, but you can easily unsubscribe: https://tinywords.com/subscriptions-php/index.php
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Subscribe via Email or SMS
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I hope you don't, or at the least, come back to tinywords at a later date.
all my very best,
Alan, With Words
November 4th, 2010 at 6:07 am
Thanks for posting that helpful answer, Alan!
November 3rd, 2010 at 5:21 pm
What I liked about this poem when I first read it was its mystery and how it triggered my imagination. Gunshots in the city or in the country make you think — what's going on? is someone being robbed or killed? Is it deer season? Or is someone just celebrating with shots in the air? I like how this short poem by "opening the dark" closes the distance between each of us. Both man and beast. Good job.
November 3rd, 2010 at 5:57 pm
I think it's great. So nice to see that haiku is more than birds and roses.
November 5th, 2010 at 7:04 am
I like the small extra space after "in the distance" and the clever phrasing of "gunshots opening the dark"
It reads like a noir film voice over opening, great! ;-)
Alan
December 13th, 2010 at 12:19 am
The choice of "opening" as the action word does wonders to this little poem. Well done!