in the distance  gunshots opening the dark

9 Responses

  1. docgnome Says:

    Gives me the creeps… In a good way :-p

  2. marlene mountain Says:

    great and in one line too
    marlene

  3. marge Says:

    please un-subscribe me….thanks.

  4. Alan Summers Says:

    Dear Marge,

    It would be a shame to see you go, but you can easily unsubscribe: http://tinywords.com/subscriptions-php/index.php

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    Alan, With Words

  5. d. f. tweney Says:

    Thanks for posting that helpful answer, Alan!

  6. Peter Newton Says:

    What I liked about this poem when I first read it was its mystery and how it triggered my imagination. Gunshots in the city or in the country make you think — what's going on? is someone being robbed or killed? Is it deer season? Or is someone just celebrating with shots in the air? I like how this short poem by "opening the dark" closes the distance between each of us. Both man and beast. Good job.

  7. dcm Says:

    I think it's great. So nice to see that haiku is more than birds and roses.

  8. Alan Summers Says:

    I like the small extra space after "in the distance" and the clever phrasing of "gunshots opening the dark"

    It reads like a noir film voice over opening, great! ;-)

    Alan

  9. William Soule Says:

    The choice of "opening" as the action word does wonders to this little poem. Well done!

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