Valentine’s Day–
she reminds me
to fasten my seatbelt
Published by
Michael Dylan Welch
Michael Dylan Welch is poet laureate of Redmond, Washington, and curator for two poetry reading series in Redmond. His latest poetry book is True Colour. He is a longtime officer of the Haiku Society of America, and proprietor of National Haiku Writing Month (www.nahaiwrimo.com). His personal website is www.graceguts.com, devoted mostly to poetry.
View all posts by Michael Dylan Welch
17 thoughts on “”
A good concrete approach to the day – safety for those we love is vital.
Excellent haiku Michael! Strong Jux, but not too strong. Just right. I really like it. Good juxtaposition is the most difficult thing for me to achieve, and other than clear and straightforward composition I think it’s the single most important element in a good haiku. Valentine’s Day is all about your spouse, and this says it wonderfully and perfectly without saying it. Inspiring. Thanks.
valentines day isn’t about spouses or love , it’s about card and candy companies. it’s another retail holiday. nice thing is, small expressions like this that bypass corporately created holidays. saturday morning could constitute the first line, and the love would shine through even more brightly
Thanks for the comments. Yes, corporate commercialism does have its grip on Valentine’s Day, but that doesn’t have to affect you unless you let it. I hope love would still shine through if I’d said “Saturday morning,” but that line doesn’t hint of love, and it loses the season word, too. We know it’s a love poem because I say Valentine’s Day. Without that, I think the poem would be less clear.
if saturday morning were used the piece would no longer be a haiku, it would become a short poem. nothing wrong with readers having to reach a little either. good poems present challenges. and…valentine’s day
doesn’t automatically imply love…i think some pretty wicked things have occured on
this day.
Isn’t love at least the first thing Valentine’s Day suggests, or least that ideal? Words denote before they connote, and the initial denotation of Valentine’s Day is surely love in some form for most people. If it connotes other things for some people, I would think (or at least hope) that that comes secondarily. In haiku or any poetry, surely the primary meaning always remains paramount.
Love is indeed the first thing Valentine’s day suggests, which opens up the possibility of juxtaposing it to pretty wicked things. But, Michael I like your bracingly unsentimental image of love.
Valentine’s Day
she asks her aging husband
if he needs to pee
Well, the poem won an honorable mention in the 2000 HSA Brady Senryu Contest. Does that answer the question? But an interesting thought is that haiku (as opposed to senryu) contain season words (check) and a caesura/pause/kireji (check). So some folks might say this qualifies as a haiku. Some folks say it’s not a haiku if it has people in it, but Basho, Buson, et al, had lots of HAIKU with people.
A good concrete approach to the day – safety for those we love is vital.
well Michael, you are a lucky man, to
have such a thoughtful wife.
That’s funny!
Valentine’s Day
messy chocolate kisses
melting hearts
Excellent haiku Michael! Strong Jux, but not too strong. Just right. I really like it. Good juxtaposition is the most difficult thing for me to achieve, and other than clear and straightforward composition I think it’s the single most important element in a good haiku. Valentine’s Day is all about your spouse, and this says it wonderfully and perfectly without saying it. Inspiring. Thanks.
“…and please keep your arms and legs inside the car at all times.”
Life’s an amusement park and you’ve captured that, Michael. Enjoy the ride!
Nothing says, “I love you,” like another’s desire to keep your heart beating in perpetuity.
These little expressions of love are so often overlooked and under-rated as simple romantic gestures.
This is wonderful.
Thank you, Michael
valentines day isn’t about spouses or love , it’s about card and candy companies. it’s another retail holiday. nice thing is, small expressions like this that bypass corporately created holidays. saturday morning could constitute the first line, and the love would shine through even more brightly
Thanks for the comments. Yes, corporate commercialism does have its grip on Valentine’s Day, but that doesn’t have to affect you unless you let it. I hope love would still shine through if I’d said “Saturday morning,” but that line doesn’t hint of love, and it loses the season word, too. We know it’s a love poem because I say Valentine’s Day. Without that, I think the poem would be less clear.
if saturday morning were used the piece would no longer be a haiku, it would become a short poem. nothing wrong with readers having to reach a little either. good poems present challenges. and…valentine’s day
doesn’t automatically imply love…i think some pretty wicked things have occured on
this day.
Isn’t love at least the first thing Valentine’s Day suggests, or least that ideal? Words denote before they connote, and the initial denotation of Valentine’s Day is surely love in some form for most people. If it connotes other things for some people, I would think (or at least hope) that that comes secondarily. In haiku or any poetry, surely the primary meaning always remains paramount.
Love is indeed the first thing Valentine’s day suggests, which opens up the possibility of juxtaposing it to pretty wicked things. But, Michael I like your bracingly unsentimental image of love.
Valentine’s Day
she asks her aging husband
if he needs to pee
(Overheard at a restaurant this evening.)
Is today’s selection a senryu?
Well, the poem won an honorable mention in the 2000 HSA Brady Senryu Contest. Does that answer the question? But an interesting thought is that haiku (as opposed to senryu) contain season words (check) and a caesura/pause/kireji (check). So some folks might say this qualifies as a haiku. Some folks say it’s not a haiku if it has people in it, but Basho, Buson, et al, had lots of HAIKU with people.
hello michael…yes excellent haiku
patsy..retail holiday..yes maybe so,been trying to think of one that isn’t.anyway a well worded haiku michael for the season.
a friend in haiku…larry
old scrap book
a valentine rose
fuels the fire
I enjoyed the haiku very much which displays that understated haiku humour which is so often underused.
winter chills
this morning–
snuggling bodies beg to differ