Like some of the other commentators, this haiku really resonates with me, Carol. Mosquitos seem to target me, and their just perceptible buzzing can even seem to drown out party conversation.
I really like the way your poem playfully captures this very human experience, and the fact that even our efforts to avoid mosquito misery can themselves still distract from our outdoor celebrations. I also love how not only does the poem subvert our expectations with the last line – the odour is not of flowers but the rather unappealing scent of insect repellent – but the very structure of the traditional haiku is inverted, with a long – short – long instead of the traditional short-long-short.
Great poetry Carol. I look forward to reading more of your works in future.
Wonderful poem.
The unpredictability of life.
"Outdoor wedding", graced, at least for the poet, not with the fragrance of flowers but the odor of insect repellent.
Sad.
January 11th, 2016 at 8:51 am
? your haiku poem.
O – Off-putting
M – Mosquito
G – Garden !
sunshine flows
through the trees
into me
May 27th, 2016 at 10:09 am
sunshine flows
through the trees
into me
Lovely image. Liquid sunshine flowing into me.
January 11th, 2016 at 8:54 am
__A welcome breeze.
Shaded maples; a minister asks the question; two robins..
January 11th, 2016 at 6:02 pm
Good one.
wedding night…
you bite my lips
mosquito
January 15th, 2016 at 3:10 pm
Oh, no! As someone who gets eaten alive by mozzies every time I go abroad, this resonates with me, Carol :(
marion
January 16th, 2016 at 12:29 am
Like some of the other commentators, this haiku really resonates with me, Carol. Mosquitos seem to target me, and their just perceptible buzzing can even seem to drown out party conversation.
I really like the way your poem playfully captures this very human experience, and the fact that even our efforts to avoid mosquito misery can themselves still distract from our outdoor celebrations. I also love how not only does the poem subvert our expectations with the last line – the odour is not of flowers but the rather unappealing scent of insect repellent – but the very structure of the traditional haiku is inverted, with a long – short – long instead of the traditional short-long-short.
Great poetry Carol. I look forward to reading more of your works in future.
Strider
May 27th, 2016 at 10:11 am
Wonderful poem.
The unpredictability of life.
"Outdoor wedding", graced, at least for the poet, not with the fragrance of flowers but the odor of insect repellent.
Sad.