Interestingly, I saw a doctor's handwriting when I read this. A prescription, perhaps. It must have been the crows against the snow that made me think of words written on paper rather than spoken. It is said that rhyme should be avoided in haiku, but I think 'crows' and 'snow' works here as the voice automatically drops when reading the last line aloud, suggesting the news is not good.
May 18th, 2016 at 2:47 pm
The weight of the 'few words', the starkness, what crows portend … so much here, love this haiku.
a small smile
the chemo nurse
tries again
May 20th, 2016 at 6:43 pm
that sad smile
Says it all.
darkness gathering
May 23rd, 2016 at 4:03 am
Interestingly, I saw a doctor's handwriting when I read this. A prescription, perhaps. It must have been the crows against the snow that made me think of words written on paper rather than spoken. It is said that rhyme should be avoided in haiku, but I think 'crows' and 'snow' works here as the voice automatically drops when reading the last line aloud, suggesting the news is not good.
marion
May 23rd, 2016 at 1:59 pm
hahahah! I'm reading this as the typical doctor's "chicken scratch" handwriting too as the unspoken connection.
But there's a somber note underlying it too – crows as a harbinger / simple spoken words of maybe a hopeless situation.
It's a bit like a lenticular picture: one view light and humorous / one view somber and chilling
May 26th, 2016 at 12:05 pm
Evocative!