a spot of light
from the hand mirror
travels up and down her arm
Issue 09.1 | 18 February 2010
Yes, nice senryu, if the last two lines are ignored as redundent and distracting.
I can, also, imagine a car mirror. A different spin. Perhaps stopped at traffic lights, as the effect takes place, an urban night, with neon and rain.
gorgeous. last lines are good for me.
I agree, the last two lines are distracting. Other than that great poetry!
Not as distracting as ”
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