talk of rain
the first drop hits
my lower lip
the well too full
for empty words to echo
Note: This is a tan renga by Jennifer Hambrick and Brad Bennett.
talk of rain
the first drop hits
my lower lip
the well too full
for empty words to echo
Note: This is a tan renga by Jennifer Hambrick and Brad Bennett.
June 25th, 2021 at 2:59 pm
Very nice, Jennifer and Brad! I like the connections between the raindrop & the full well, and the talk & the words. The poem starts off sensual and ends full of emotion.
June 25th, 2021 at 3:03 pm
I enjoyed this Jennifer and Brad–especially the raindrop/full well.
June 27th, 2021 at 5:48 am
my umbrella drips
pacing nature's tempo song
July 17th, 2021 at 12:06 pm
Thanks so much, Mary. Brad Bennett wrote the haiku, and I wrote the final two-line capping verse.
July 17th, 2021 at 12:14 pm
Thank you, Mary Jo! In writing the final two-line capping verse to Brad’s haiku, I wanted to take the “talk of rain” out of the superficial realm of empty weather chat and really plumb the emotions of that metaphor. The drop of rain that hits the “lower lip” in Brad’s haiku struck me as the first drop in a storm of words, a flood of emotions to come. To me, all that emotion was latent in the sensory imagery of the haiku.