end-of-season
one after another
the     carnival     lights     blink     out

8 Responses

  1. Jay Friedenberg Says:

    There should be a tab between each word in the last line to reflect the lights going out one by one.

    –Jay Friedenberg (the author)

  2. Alan Summers Says:

    I'm glad the tabs were added now, even more special!

    Alan

  3. Alan Summers Says:

    Loved the haiku, and the end of season haiku about a carnival.

    end-of-season
    one after another
    the carnival lights blink out

    —JAY FRIEDENBERG

    in-between seasons
    the tsukutsukubõshi buzz
    of “not yet Autumn”

    Alan Summers
    Publications credits: Icebox, Japan (Autumn 2010); Travelogue on World Haiku Festival 2002 Part 1 (Akita International Haiku Network 2010)

    *

    across city downs
    the moon not yet a quarter
    a circus lights up

    Alan Summers
    Publications credits: Hobo, Tasmania (March 1996); HI no. 35 November Japan 1998

    *

  4. seaviewwarrenpoint Says:

    I will have to look up what that buzz is all about in your first haiku, Alan, but the last one made me think of The Epsom Downs. Really lovely.

    marion

  5. Alan Summers Says:

    Hi Marion,

    Didn't see this comment, usually get an alert email!

    The buzz is of the cicadas, and if you hear them at Suma Temple, which Basho visited, then the Samurai legend is that time stands still between Summer and Autumn.

    I was there with my NHP colleague Maki Nishida whose parents lived nearby.

    Ah, yes, the various Downs and the magical circus companies that would visit either Summer or Winter, I believe?

    Thanks!

    warm regards,
    Alan

  6. Jay Friedenberg Says:

    Very nice Alan, love your work.

  7. Alan Summers Says:

    Thanks Jay!

    I got an alert email from your comment so able to see Marion posted too. :-)

    Yes, the spacing really lifts your haiku even higher, it's like a 3D haiku now, almost in Flash. Even more magical!

    Alan

  8. seaviewwarrenpoint Says:

    Love the sad atmosphere created here and the layout really works, mirroring the lights going out one by one.

    marion

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