Wonderful poem, Kat. A beautifully observed – I was going to say "reflection" but probably more accurate to call it a beautifully observed 'refraction" on human nature. With a scientific background myself I always enjoy poems like this, which manage to "re-weave the rainbow", humanizing a fully scientific understanding of the world.
It is also an excellent example of the slightly different and thoughtful effects which can be achieved through a longer tanka-style poem rather than haiku.
Thank you, Strider. Like you, I enjoy reading and writing poems that work on multiple levels. This tanka tickles me a bit for that very reason: the word "energy" refers to the literal Sun's energy and also to the somewhat abstract energy/effort we put into our lives, and so the word is meant to act as a pivot. I look forward to reading more of your poems and thoughts as well. Thanks for your thoughtful and kind comment!
September 3rd, 2015 at 10:31 am
These words created a very relaxed and peaceful vibe for me. Well done!
hammock strings
the tension
I let go
Lamart
September 4th, 2015 at 9:07 am
I'm so glad, Lamart! Thank you. Ah, memories of hammocks.
September 4th, 2015 at 4:18 am
Beautiful depiction of nature and human nature.
netted garden
the sun spotlights
butterflies
September 4th, 2015 at 3:23 pm
Wonderful poem, Kat. A beautifully observed – I was going to say "reflection" but probably more accurate to call it a beautifully observed 'refraction" on human nature. With a scientific background myself I always enjoy poems like this, which manage to "re-weave the rainbow", humanizing a fully scientific understanding of the world.
It is also an excellent example of the slightly different and thoughtful effects which can be achieved through a longer tanka-style poem rather than haiku.
Look forward to reading more by Kat in future
Strider
September 9th, 2015 at 7:29 pm
Thank you, Strider. Like you, I enjoy reading and writing poems that work on multiple levels. This tanka tickles me a bit for that very reason: the word "energy" refers to the literal Sun's energy and also to the somewhat abstract energy/effort we put into our lives, and so the word is meant to act as a pivot. I look forward to reading more of your poems and thoughts as well. Thanks for your thoughtful and kind comment!
November 4th, 2015 at 8:34 pm
too bad summer is over