loneliness…
my spit draws
more minnows

 

Published by

Brad Bennett

Brad Bennett has published three collections of haiku with Red Moon Press, a drop of pond (2016),a turn in the river (2019), and a box of feathers (2022). a drop of pond won a Touchstone Distinguished Book Award from the Haiku Foundation.

5 thoughts on “”

  1. Interesting haiku, Brad. The poem depicts the sublime sense of loneliness with brevity. Here are some of my haiku on loneliness:

    clatters of sparrow–
    someone still with my
    loneliness

    Chrysanthemum 13, 2013

    *****
    loneliness–
    temple bell fills
    the vacuum

    A Hundred Gourds, 2:3 June 2013

    *****
    wild flower–
    I breathe my
    loneliness

    The Heron’s Nest, Vol.XVI, No.4 December 2014

    *****

  2. Nice Brad.
    __ As I see this, minnows are drawn to that lonely ring, and "read" that ring to find results. _m

    a spatter
    this ring on Fresh Pond
    fish read.

  3. .
    loneliness…
    my spit draws
    more minnows

    —BRAD BENNETT

    .
    .

    This resonated with me so strongly!

    It also reminds me of Hosai Ozaki

    ???????

    seki o shite mo hitori

    Coughing, even:
    alone

    Hosai Ozaki (1885-1926)
    Translation from "Technique used in Modern Japanese Haiku"
    Vocabulary and Structure, Ban’ya NATSUISHI (2015)

    .
    Unusually I started this haiku with a preposition:

    .
    in the river reflection
    he watches himself
    watch the sunset

    Alan Summers
    Haiku Enlightenment, Gabriel Rosenstock Cambridge Scholars Publishing (2009) ISBN (10): 1-4438-0521-1, ISBN (13): 978-1-4438-0521-6;

    Page 54: There is a relaxed feeling of lightness – karumi – in the above haiku, employing everyday syntax and easily recognised imagery. Karumi became Basho’s ideal in the final phase of his development.

    Gabriel Rosenstock
    Haiku Enlightenment Gabriel Rosenstock

    This was a particularly lonely time, and just my reflection kept company.

    Alan
    Cambridge Scholars Publishing (2009) ISBN (10): 1-4438-0521-1, ISBN (13): 978-1-4438-0521-6

Respond here