A neat haiku where that glorious middle line is the actual 'aha!' A great example of not just a 'pivot line' but the strong focus of the poem need not always be the opening or closing line. Those lines feel enhanced by that hinge effect we have of 'in the shower's rhythm'.
noon sunlight
in the shower’s rhythm
white chrysanthemum
—MARTIN GOTTLIEB COHEN
The Mainichi (Japan) November 2014
***
I stumble over the word
as if an awkward goodbye
chrysanthemums
June 6th, 2020 at 3:59 am
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A neat haiku where that glorious middle line is the actual 'aha!' A great example of not just a 'pivot line' but the strong focus of the poem need not always be the opening or closing line. Those lines feel enhanced by that hinge effect we have of 'in the shower's rhythm'.
noon sunlight
in the shower’s rhythm
white chrysanthemum
—MARTIN GOTTLIEB COHEN
The Mainichi (Japan) November 2014
***
I stumble over the word
as if an awkward goodbye
chrysanthemums
Alan Summers
Asahi Shimbun (Japan) October 2019