a hot date
the gentle creaking
of moored boats

 

 

 

(Originally published in Frogpond vol. 43:3 (fall) 2020).

3 Responses

  1. Alan Summers Says:

    I love the interplay of juxtaposition, from hot date (various levels) to gentle and creaking of nearby boats. The poem gives and gives and gives.

    warm regards,
    Alan

  2. Alan Summers Says:

    re:

    a hot date
    the gentle creaking
    of moored boats

    —Marta Chocilowska
    (Originally published in Frogpond vol. 43:3 (fall) 2020)

    I can imagine that a hot date developed into physical passion, perhaps hidden by trees, bushes, etc… close enough to a river where boats are moored, and can be heard in the near distance.

    Are the two parts of the haiku in the same timeline?

    Is this a poem of reminiscence? Perhaps the author was nervous and listening out to sounds in the early stages of their passion, worried about someone or a group stumbling upon them. Perhaps things appeared safe and private and the only noise for a while was the gentle creaking of boats in the near distance, and nothing else, and then the passion fully took over.

    Of course post-passion, the author might be more attuned to background noise.

    I don't get that that the people were actually in a boat, but close by, near a riverbank perhaps.

    warm regards,
    Alan

  3. ann Says:

    if it was a hot date
    it wouldn't be
    gentle creaking
    now would it.

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